Repartee with ruler (judge, etc.) – miscellaneous.
The wise and the foolish. · Cleverness. · Clever verbal retorts (repartee). · Repartee with ruler (judge, etc.). · view the constellation · filed as J1289
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Filed under Repartee with ruler (judge, etc.).
20 finer motifs beneath it
Not a locksmith. A judge asks a pseudo-prophet to prove his powers by opening a difficult lock. "I am a prophet, not a locksmith." Bishop and prince. Peasant tells bishop, who rides by with forty horses, that he wonders if St. Kilian at Würzburg is also riding with forty horses. Bishop excuses extravagance by saying that he is also a prince and that it is the prince, not the bishop, who is using the horses. "If the prince should become a fool, what would the bishop do then?" Will not try to correct them. Pope calls persistent courtier a fool. Latter says that there are people who call the pope the same thing and that he for one will not try to correct them The needy philosopher. Philosopher asks ruler for money Ruler says that philosophers do not need money. Philosopher: "If I am rewarded, I will say that you are right; I will no longer need money." Wearing all his clothes. Shivering king (rich man) to tattered peasant: "Aren't you cold?" Peasant: "No, if you wore all your clothes as I do, you wouldn't be cold either!" The prince's excuse. King to son who has been accused of rape: "I never did anything like that." Prince: "Your father was not king!" King: "Your son will never be one if you keep that up!" Shoemaker speaks ill of lord's rule. Lord takes his tools away from him. Shoemaker begs for them saying that he cannot carry on his business without them. Ruler: "I thought ruling was your business so I took your tools to learn shoemaking." One ear saved for other litigant. Judge stops up one ear while first litigant presents his case. He is saving one ear for the second litigant Seek harmony in your own house. King brought to sense of duty by philosopher who tells him to seek harmony in his own house before inquiring about the harmony in his kingdom King cannot destroy the city. A philosopher of the city came to him asking mercy for it King said he would do nothing he asked. Philosopher then asked him to destroy the city. This saves the city Man, fined for sabbath-breaking, asks for receipt, explains that if God asks for it, he will not have to journey to hell to get it from the judge Man is arrested for drunkenness; he is so drunk that trial must be postponed. When he is tried later, he is told how at the earlier trial he had kept repeating that the judge was a very wise judge. When he hears this he admits that he must have been very drunk Weaver hearing of tax for every doorway of weavers takes his door to the khan: will not return for the sidewalls of his house Gem offered by monarch to one who can first go around the kingdom. Trickster goes around king and says king is kingdom Thief serves king buffaloes he has killed in hunt and lost; thus reproaches king's wastefulness Hairless palms from giving and receiving gold. Jester flatters prince for bounty Emperor: "What people have the biggest bellies?" Jester answers: "The landlords." Holy man asked by king for the heart of religion answers: "You are sitting on your throne and I'm sitting on the ground, so how can I tell." Tailor caught resting his head on royal robe while he rests tells king there is no better resting place for king's robe, for "the head is the king of the body." King to smoker: "Even donkeys will have nothing to do with tobacco." Smoker: "Donkeys don't know how to enjoy themselves."
Filed beside it
"If I were a tyrant you would not say so." Answer made by emperor to one who calls him a tyrant Trickster chooses his gift. To be rewarded by ruler with a coin, an ass, a sheep, or a vineyard. Answers that he will take the coin, mount the ass, drive the sheep into the vineyard, and there pray for the ruler Gifts from the brothers. A king gives a man a coin. "Is that all you give your brother?" "Are you my brother?" "Surely, we both pray, Our father, etc." "If all your brothers give you as much as I you will be rich." Do not leave it to your successor. A widow stops a ruler on his way to war. He may be killed and he should not leave the act of justice as a credit to his successor Against his will. A thief condemned to the gallows tells the king, "I do what you do and it is against my will." King: "You shall also be hanged against your will." His proper title. A peasant goes to a judge and thinking to gain his favor addresses him with high titles. The judge calls him a fool. "I was mistaken, you swine!"
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